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Wednesday, July 20th, 2005
3:54 pm - Sitting here worried that this will be remembered as the Polyphonic Ringtone Age
I normally don’t let weather dictate wardrobe, but the sun is hanging out in the Springs right now like we’re having a two for one sale on orange. I am wearing shorts right now for the first time in five years. I, of course, didn’t have any on hand so I took a pair of meat shears to a pair of old jeans. Note to self: Don’t use meat shears on denim. These new shorts of mine are functional, but they have the most crooked cut at the knees you’ve ever seen. They will only be for use at home, and only after I have a S.W.A.T. team sweep the house for unannounced guests.

I hate hate hate returning mail-order goods. So much, in fact, that I actually considered keeping the ceiling fan I received that has a color similar to something that has been dipped in vat of Dijon mustard then left to decay in a field of nuclear fallout. How they could post a picture online that is that inaccurate is a mystery that will haunt me until…. ok, never mind, I’m over it (fuck, no I’m not.)

current mood: annoyed

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Tuesday, June 21st, 2005
9:26 pm - Face down in the guarantees, jaundiced marshalls getting busy with ease
So SPIN magazine finally gets something right.

I got a ticket a couple of days ago, my first in Colorado. Kudos to the CO Police for not wasting any time during this procedure. I’ve been pulled over about eight times in California, and those guys just burn all kinds of time. You would think they were running your face through Interpol or writing out your ticket in calligraphy. The cop here had the ticket in my hand faster than I get my drink at Starbucks, I shit you not (for those of you wondering, 39 in a 30.)

Strange Factoid About Myself:

- I use bottled water in my humidifier.

People That Are Pissing Me Off today:

- My mailman who refuses to come to the door with registered mail.
- Fast food commercials writers who are using the word “melty” as an adjective.
- ABC Producers who keep cutting to Eva Longoria in the stands during the NBA Finals. This woman is so overrated, it makes me ill. Just another average celebrity that suddenly looks fantastic wearing a successful show.

current mood: mellow

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Monday, June 20th, 2005
12:23 pm
Previous entries hidden (for now).

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