An undefined variable (spaceage) wrote,
An undefined variable

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Sitting here worried that this will be remembered as the Polyphonic Ringtone Age

I normally don’t let weather dictate wardrobe, but the sun is hanging out in the Springs right now like we’re having a two for one sale on orange. I am wearing shorts right now for the first time in five years. I, of course, didn’t have any on hand so I took a pair of meat shears to a pair of old jeans. Note to self: Don’t use meat shears on denim. These new shorts of mine are functional, but they have the most crooked cut at the knees you’ve ever seen. They will only be for use at home, and only after I have a S.W.A.T. team sweep the house for unannounced guests.

I hate hate hate returning mail-order goods. So much, in fact, that I actually considered keeping the ceiling fan I received that has a color similar to something that has been dipped in vat of Dijon mustard then left to decay in a field of nuclear fallout. How they could post a picture online that is that inaccurate is a mystery that will haunt me until…. ok, never mind, I’m over it (fuck, no I’m not.)
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